Family
by theeflowerchild
Summary: It is during the Great Ninja War that Kakashi can finally, out loud, call these kids his family. It is during the Great Ninja War that Kakashi, like Naruto, and like Sakura, is finally, in his own eyes, an adult. Kakashi is a man and his heart swells with pride as he protects those that he loves.


**Family  
**theeflowerchild

* * *

Kakashi decided that never having children would be in his best interest.

He was a ninja, after all; he was constantly taking care of a Jounin cell or, on occasion, being called back into the ANBU black-ops to participate in a borderline suicidal S-rank mission. Being a shinobi was, perhaps, the most dangerous job in the world and he knew he was already married to his job at a young age; he had caught the love-bug the first time he'd ever seen a kunai and was hooked ever since.

So, at that young age, he decided that a family was absolutely out of the question and that, either way, he wouldn't be missing out anyway.

On one hand, the only family he had ever really had was his father, and that was barely anything. He was warped into the same business as he was; Kakashi did not mind, though. In fact, it was quite the opposite; Kakashi looked up to his father and held him in incredibly high regards, seeing that he could (barely) handle a family and a high-ranking job as a ninja.

And when his father promised to take him to learn a new jutsu or to throw shuriken, when he went back on his promise, Kakashi did not whine or even make a sullen face, for he knew his father had left him within good reason.

This was also the reason he decided, as a ninja, children were not for the best.

At a young age, though, Kakashi got a taste of what real family was like.

When accepted into the three-man cell, along with two frivolous genin and a Jounin with a disturbing sunny disposition and blonde hair that you could not miss from Suna, Kakashi immediately decided not to get attached. It was simple at first; turn down all of Rin's forwards, ignore Obito's stupid attitude and incompetence and don't even dare get dragged into Minato-sensei's silly stories or pointless "tests of ninja way."

But then, Kakashi had fallen into a dynamic with the three and, he hadn't noticed, but he had—reluctantly—become attached. The relationships were sloppy and near invisible, but they were there and there was absolutely no going back.

Obito would call him horrible names and talk about his "incompetence," while he would bite back a few insults which would slowly drag into laughs and possibly a spar that, ultimately, Kakashi would win, but Obito was, always, noticeably better. Then Rin would offer him lunch that she made—but to not Obito, never Obito—which he eventually began taking, while Obito would sulk. Minato would make a comment along the lines of, "sharing is caring!" and then, after finishing, Kakashi would almost always declare a duel between himself and his teacher, which he would always lose, though Minato would always make a note of how much stronger he was getting day by day.

He would also notice how much Kakashi's ultimate downfall was slowly cracking and he was succumbing to "useless" teamwork.

It was instantaneous, nor did Kakashi sit down one day and say to himself, "They are my family," but the group of "useless" people he had grown accustomed to seeing every day, hearing from, eating dinner with, going on countless, C-rank missions with, and sparring with were, slowly, but surely, becoming somewhat of a make-shift family to him.

It was when he had cautiously accepted this that everything began to crumble before his eyes.

The infamous mission that he could never, ever remove from his mind and that constant stream of guilt that would forever be etched into his being was the first disaster to happen (along with his first _real_ encounter with death). He was hurt first, something he was no used to, being the prodigy of The Leaf; he had lost an eye, and it was painful, so painful he almost _cried_, but he had to push forward fight for those he had grown content with. Despite the pain, he fought, to defend his _family_.

And he _lost_.

In turn, he was given a gift by a boy he would forever call his brother in his mind, but never out loud. It was a gift he would need to hone and would not be able to use constantly, but he graciously accepted it as this boy—his _brother_—'s dying wish. He was given a kekkei genkai that he would use with absolute _pride_ in the name of his fallen comrade.

He would forever train this skill and it would give him a name that, when heard, his heart would swell with honor and pain, "Do you hear that, Obito? You idiot, you will _never_ be forgotten."

After that, Rin was never the same. She did not share delicious lunches, she did not talk to him about her day, or her family, she did not talk to him about the new jutsus she was learning all on her own, or about how she wanted to become a medic-nin when she was older. When she did speak to him, the only thing she could find herself saying was, _"I wish I was dead_."

Her wish came true months later on a near-suicide mission; whether she made it to be that or Minato had claimed it was, Kakashi did not know, but he never did quite forgive himself for not being able to protect her.

Kakashi could never quite put his tongue on what he decided Rin was; he loved her all the same, but was she a sister-figure? No, that definitely was not it; calling her his sister seemed… inappropriate and _wrong_. Maybe he had, over the course of their friendship, returned the feelings in his own little way and not noticed—despite his keen intelligence and strength, he was always a little dense—but she was not his sister, nor was she his lover.

Shortly after, as if the fates were against him, Minato had convivially accepted the position as the fourth Hokage, the Yondaime, and Kakashi had lost his _father_; a man who would put everything down for him, who would spar with him, through shuriken, invite solely him out for dinner at a ramen stand he _claimed_ he hated, but would go anyway because he loved being with this person so much.

Now, he was gone. Everybody he had ever, reluctantly, loved was completely out of his reach. That was when he decided, despite Minato's protests, to become an ANBU black-op. He was accepted with open arms, due to his incredible strength, stealth and a poker-face nobody could press. He had, by then, trained the Sharingan to almost perfection (or what he could deem perfection, seeing has his body was, almost, not fit for such a kekkei genkai). He had decided that ANBU black-ops were his best choice; if he died, he did not care, and if he did not die, at least he was doing something for his country.

And there was nobody to get attached to.

He fought to his heart's content, allowing blood to spill upon his hands without a second thought. He murdered whoever he had to, with his infamous poker-face and, occasionally, his Sharingan. He was nearly a machine, but he did not mind.

At one point in his life, he had come across Uchiha Itachi of the clan that truly held his nick-name. He had a poker-face that could rival his own, and he was lithe, like a ballerina; when he murdered, it was almost unseen, it was as if the blood had never spilled across the beautiful boy's hands, and Kakashi was jealous. He was _furious_ with this boy, who had stumbled along and made murder seem so _easy_, like there was not a _care _in this idiotic, talented, prodigious boy's life and that he could murder, and move on and have a _life_, of all things.

He nearly told him such a thing, too, but decided against it—and regretted it, years later, when the Uchiha clan was slaughtered by this murderous ballerina of a man.

It was also at this moment when Kakashi decided to resign as a black-op, because, though he had no family or loved-ones or bonds of any sort, he was positive he was absolutely capable of what this sick, twisted boy had just done to the people he loved, and that was when he had had enough.

(He also thanked Kami multiple times for having taken Obito's life earlier in such an honorable way, rather than have him murdered. Maybe it was fate that Obito die at a young age; he was far too innocent and precious as a human being to be taken by some sick and twisted teenage boy with no reason except the fact that he'd probably _cracked_.)

The Hokage, who was Sarutobi now that Minato had died in the most honorable of ways, protecting the village he held dearly to his heart, and protecting a family he loved more than anything. Kakashi hoped that one day, maybe, he could be just like his sensei, but that would never happen; he was not his sensei, and he was not clean, pure, and happy, just like he was. He could only hope that maybe, somewhere, Minato was looking down on him with a smile on his face and pride in his eyes for what he had become.

Though, Kakashi could not say he was proud of himself, and he would not be able to say such a thing until much, much later in his life.

Somehow, years after becoming a Jounin and taking on B-rank and A-rank missions, Kakashi had gotten himself caught up in genin, three-man cells, much to his displeasure. It was his job to pass be the mentor of these genin, and he had been hand-picked by the elders of the god-forsaken country he loved so much, thus, he could not turn it down.

That did not mean he had to _pass_ the students, though.

That was, until he had come across the strangest and most _perfect_ combination he'd ever seen as a ninja. He was nearly taken aback when he had waltzed into the classroom they had been waiting for him in; he was so distracted when he had received the names, that he had fallen for a silly prank the blonde had stationed above a door (which he could use to his advantage, later, in stating that he already despised the three).

His sensei's son, a carbon copy, almost, an Uchiha with an emotionless face and eyes that betrayed him, and a pink-haired girl with unbelievable chakra-control and enough love to feed an entire village for decades.

He had decided before he had even met them that he would not, in any way, shape, or form, get attached, but he had said that about his original cell, too.

He almost did not pass them due to his little promise to himself, knowing he could not get attached if he never bothered to _know_ them, but he eventually found it impossible in his heart to do such a thing, and reluctantly allowed them to pass the test that the father of one of his passing students had created, himself.

He had pursed his lips and given them a thumbs-up. He would not get attached.

It was until the chuunin exams that he actually found himself falling for his three students and taking on a father-like figure, despite himself. Naruto had gone off in search of more power with one of the infamous Sannin, Sakura had self-exiled herself in the fact that she had lost (but had one something completely useful, Kakashi had noticed, but allowed her to find out what that exactly was on her own) and then there was the Uchiha.

Kakashi had decided, despite a little voice inside himself telling him _don't you dare_, to take the boy under his wing.

It was in Sasuke's best interest, he had said; it was the only logical thing to do, take him under his wing and teach him to fight, teach him to _win_. He would teach him the best moves his could, despite the little voice, and show Sasuke was it truly means to be a _ninja_.

It works out, for the most part, teaching the broken little boy the chidori, teaching him how to really use taijutsu. He even offers to teach the boy his special, albeit hilarious move, "One-thousand-years of death!" to which he declines with a scowl, muttering something along the lines of _idiot-teacher_, and Kakashi can almost _feel_ the bond growing between them, like the one that has forged between Sasuke and Naruto.

It, again, won't be until later when Kakashi realizes the pink-haired-girl's full potential and decides that it was incredibly _stupid_ of him to not notice before-hand what an amazing, spectacular, _strong_ kunoichi she is—how she'll be the strongest of all since the Godaime herself—and that he should've focused on her even more-so when she was young, and taught her to hone that incredible chakra control she was _born_ with.

Sasuke, inevitably, loses; he's not sure if the loss is to Gaara, or Naruto, or even himself. He did not push it, though, and allowed things to unfold on their own, something he, again, regrets.

Kakashi will regret many things in his life, but will not learn that they were all for the best until much, _much_ later, and that everything happens for a reason, and it was fate that brought him to a perfect ending.

Again (and again and again and again), Kakashi does not mature enough to realize this until much later in his life, along with many other things.

Less than a year later, Sasuke leaves, and there is absolutely nothing he can do about it. He is gone of his own free will and seeks power that does not exist. He almost tells the retrieval team how absolutely _pointless_ it is for them to go after him; he is not Sasuke anymore, but a shell of himself hell-bent on a mission that he may lose and, if he does not try, he will always be this shell of a boy without a _family_.

Just like before, Kakashi's family is slowly crumbling, right in front of his eyes.

Despite himself, he goes after Naruto and follows him and sees a fight that was long-overdue, not unlike the ones between Obito and himself, but there is something different. This bond that was forged is almost unbreakable, whether this Uchiha sees it or not himself, and Kakashi knows that Naruto will never, _ever_ stop looking and pining for his fallen comrade.

Kakashi will never admit it, but something inside of him breaks when Sasuke leaves the village for power that does not quite exist and he sees a little of himself inside the fallen boy.

Naruto soon follows, leaving with a Sannin who writes those books he adores and keep him sane and a little more down-to-earth, in search of power that just might exist. He knows Naruto will become stronger than his wildest dreams and Jiraiya will be the one to do this; Kakashi regrets not being able to give Naruto this strength he needs to bring back his best friend, his son of sorts, but he knows he is in the right hands with this Jiraiya-figure.

Then, there is Sakura.

Sakura will never, _ever_ be the same and it is like music to his ears. She is crushed when she is not able to attend the mission to retrieve her best friend, the love of her life, the boy she offered food and dates to, trained for, and that is when she realizes that everything she ever did was wrong.

She must become strong if she ever wants _anybody's_ attention, and Kakashi cannot help but smile and allow his heart to swell with pride at her realization. When both his sons are gone, he is left with a broken daughter hell-bent on fixing a team that was never quite perfect. This love that could feed a village for decades multiplies and Kakashi wants more than anything to take this girl under his wing and nurture her and mold her into a strong kunoichi, and when he makes this realization, she is gone, too.

Just like his other two make-shift children, she is taken under the wing of a Sannin, and is forged into one of the greatest medical minds of her time. She could send Kakashi himself flying with her pinky, just like her mentor, and Kakashi regrets.

He regrets not giving this love-struck pink-haired girl the time of day. He regrets knowing that she held this power within herself and the ability to become this fierce, wild _ninja_ and not doing anything about it. He regrets focusing his attention on two boys who would ultimately leave him, leave the nest and leave their father to focus on unattainable power when this girl was within his grasp.

Though he regrets, he is not sad, because maybe he _deserved_ this. It was his fault, for always ignoring the kunoichi of the group, and he is not upset, because she _deserves_ this power that takes years of training, just to become as strong as the boys—her boys, including himself—and now, she is up to par with the rest.

He watches her grow, and that is when Kakashi realizes that Sakura is just as important to Team 7 as his two sons. That is when Kakashi decides that Sakura is, in fact, a daughter of sorts and this broken family is not something he wants to lose.

When Naruto _finally_ comes back after years of training, he is not a boy, but a man, and Kakashi is _proud_ of this man he refers to as his son in his own little mind, and Kakashi is _proud_ of the woman he refers to as is daughter.

It is a taboo of sorts to even mention the Uchiha out loud in front of the two, so he does not, but every once in a while he finds his mind wandering to the lost, shell of a boy he used to call his son, but now he calls a traitor.

Maybe not to the village, but a traitor to Kakashi; the man who had taught him everything, he had betrayed without a second thought and that _crushed_ Kakashi, though he'd never admit it.

Along with regrets and realizations, there were also many things Kakashi would not admit out loud, but when he was alone and relaxing, he allowed his mind to wander and admit.

When the come across Sasuke for the first time in many years, he is not a man like Naruto; Sasuke is a broken, hollow shell of a boy with no family, no home, and no way, but the revenge he has promised himself. His eyes are not hard and cold, like most believe, but wet, and they betray his entire being, just like when he was younger.

Kakashi wonders where he went wrong.

He attempts to kill him men, and he sees the broken look in his eyes when he sees the new member, Sai, who looks disturbingly like Sasuke and _actually_ no emotions and almost regrets bringing him along.

Sasuke does not waver, though, and sadly attempts to destroy them all. He fails, and Kakashi wonders if it is because he is just not strong enough, or because he honestly can't bring himself to do it.

He really, _really_ hopes it's the last one.

He will see Sasuke four more times before deciding that he is, finally, the man he hoped the boy would grow into.

Meanwhile, they go on missions together; Naruto, Sakura, Sai, Yamato and him, and it is _almost_ the same. Kakashi begins to feel warmth when he sees the broken man, Sai, and begins to _feel_ for him, just like he felt for Sasuke.

And when Sai _finally_, _genuinely_ shows emotion, despite himself, Kakashi welcomes the boy in with open arms and a smile from underneath a mask he will never take off, and Sai cries like the child he was never able to be, and he is accepted as one of Kakashi's kin.

Kakashi's _family_, and his family is slowly growing.

They see Sasuke again, and he is with Sakura and Naruto, at the time. Sasuke is still a boy with a nightmare, not a dream, but now he is followed by a group that he, ironically, calls _hebi_, of all things and Kakashi almost _laughs_, because this boy still has Orochimaru in him, somewhere, enough that he'd call his team _snake_.

He sees the hurt in Sakura's eyes when a broken, bombshell of a red-head is at Sasuke's side, but she, in turn, just grows_ angrier_. She _allows_ this hurt of another woman working for the Uchiha to course within her and makes her _stronger_.

That is when Sakura's craters grow larger, nights grow longer and healing is nearly fool-proof.

Naruto grows _just_ as angry, feeling _replaced_. "I thought you didn't _want_ a team, Sasuke. I thought you were better off _alone,_ you _bastard_," he had mumbled on the way home. The fallen boy hadn't even given them the time of day, and that makes Naruto _mad._

Naruto is not _angry_, Naruto is not _pissed_, Naruto is blindly _furious_ and Kakashi is fucking _proud_.

He is _proud_ that they are finally _angry_ with their _friend_, their _brother_, his _son._ He is _proud_ they have finally decided to take things seriously and kick the sorry kid's _ass_. He is _proud_ that_ finally_ after all these years of the fallen boy being a cheesy _taboo_, Naruto has stalked off to become a sage and Sakura is now, _finally_, as strong as her Sannin, of not stronger.

Kakashi could not be _prouder_.

The third time they "run into" the Uchiha, Itachi is dead, Danzo is dead, and he is attacking his home. Kakashi believes he has regressed to an infant, but makes no comment on it. It is then when he is asked to be Hokage, and as aloof as he seems, in his mind, he is jumping at the chance, to be _just like his sensei_.

To protect his village, to protect his kin and to protect his _family_.

He can't tell if he's upset, but Tsunade wakes up and takes back her chair as the head of the village. Kakashi is sent to the front lines and that's when he realizes he is happy; even if he's not running the war, he is able to fight for those that he _loves_.

It is during the Great Ninja War that Kakashi can finally, out loud, call these kids _his family_. It is during the Great Ninja War that Kakashi, like Naruto, and like Sakura, is finally, in his own eyes, an adult.

Kakashi is a _man_ and his heart swells with pride as he protects those that he loves.

He does, protect his life that is. He protects Sakura and Naruto and even _Sasuke_, of all people, because once this near-pointless war is over, he sees Sasuke.

He is on his knees; he is broken, crying at his best friend, his _brother's_ feet and he is begging for salvation.

Sasuke is a man.

Kakashi is _proud_ of his sons and daughter, of his children, of his life. His heart swells for them as they all begin crying, weeping, laughing and it isn't until they look at their sensei and expect him to join in that the familiar, warm smile surfaces behind his mask.

He sees a blonde boy, his sensei's son, a broken Uchiha with eyes that betray him, and a girl with enough love to feed a village for decades.

He sees his children, his family, and he regrets nothing.

* * *

**This was supposed to be a drabble, but it ended up being much longer, lol. Enjoy, review if you'd like, constructive criticism is wanted. **


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